Hair

Yes, you guessed it, this post is going to be all about hair. Why? Because I just spent the last hour putting my poor hair into sponge curlers? No no no. That’s not it at all. How very silly of you! If that were the case, my arms would be aching right now and I wouldn’t be posing anything at all!

*rubs aching arms*

Yes, it’s true, I’m currently waiting for the spongey sponge to dry. To dry my hair that is. I’ll probably take lovely pictures and post them on facebook. Those of you who stalk me there as well can see what lovely results there are from endless agony of the sponge.

I have had smooth silky hair that everyone loves to pet my entire life. “Lucky you!” says the random crowd-go-er. “Not at all!” says I. You see, long silky hair is lovely, and FLAT. When my hair was very long I envied those curly haired people with the long frizzy hair that always looked so perfect with just a little bit of no-friz gel. So I decided to use sponge curlers. I ended up with a world of pain when I realized just what sponge curlers do.

With long hair, you spend an hour+ rolling these lil spongey things into your beautiful long STRAIGHT hair while it’s wet. And when you finally finish your arms ache from holding them up for the past x-long. You feel so very accomplished! There is your hair all neatly wrapped up in tight little curls and they’ll be big and lush and beautiful!!! Wrong. You’re expected to sleep in these things. ?! I know. With me, it didn’t happen. So I looked for other alternatives. Perhaps I could blow dry my hair? Don’t try this. Your scalp is exposed at every instance, don’t even remotely try this. It doesn’t even work. And after waiting and waiting and drying and waiting for HOURS, my hair still wasn’t curly. At all. I recall a few awkward bumps. But after all of the blow drying and waiting and waiting and waiting, my hair was now not silky smooth, but also not in lush curls. It looked like a crimping style gone horribly wrong.

So with the help of some friends, I asked for my long beautiful hair to be curled. And they readily pounced on it with curlers and irons and moose and hairspray. Oh God the hairspray! I was followed by a hairspray cloud the rest of the day! And do you know what? The curls fell out within the hour. They didn’t even stay. They said hello and then *thbbt!* left. No “I’ll call you”s. They snuck out in the night like a guilty politician.

Thus I say to your curly-haired folk: cherish your curls!!! You  need only a flat iron to make your hair straight, and yet we straight-haired folk go to such great lengths to make our hair curly. . . AND FAIL! How very sad! 😦 Enjoy your curls and the leisure in which you leave your life!! And that never in a number of your days will you ever need to look like this.

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2 thoughts on “Hair

  1. lol!

    i am one of those w/the naturally curly hair that i’ve hated all my life … b/c my parents hated it on me; they didn’t like my hair. my g-parents didn’t like my hair. my ex husband, shortly b4 the divorce, finally confessed he hated my hair (he would never tell me he liked it) when he told me i looked like medusa.

    and b/c i grew up on the beach in the 70’s/80’s when farrah faucet hair was THE thing, and my hair would NEVER EVER EVER do that, especially w/ 100% humidity all.the.time.

    not until i met my now-husband, two years ago, have i even begun to think my hair is beautiful … b/c he does. it was such a shock to me. everyone has always hated my hair and told me i look terrible and ugly. i’m 45 yrs old and just now beginning to think i might be pretty.

    oh, and all those products for curly hair to make it look great? i’m allergic to them.

    hair spray doesn’t work for me either, and i’m allergic to most of it.

    ***

    love the pic – absolutely stunningly beautiful eyes!

    and, i envy straight hair … so much so that i prayed and prayed while i was pregnant for my kids’ hair – that they would have great hair and not ‘my’ hair. God, in His great mercy, answered my prayers. my girls both have GREAT hair.

    obsessed w/hair, you ask? when i worked outside the home b4 kids, my most routine prayer in the mornings was for God to give me a good-hair-day – yep, it sure was. and you know what? God cared about my hair.

  2. Aww, I’ve always envied curly hair, so I guess it’s fair. :3 I managed to find that picture online, isn’t she beautiful? I mean, rollers just look silly, but she almost makes them look good! Almost. . .

    How very sad! I’m sure it’s lovely. I’ve rarely seen a curly mop done wrong. And the few times I have seen curly hair done wrong, they were fake. What a bummer about the hair products. Ever been able to track down a natural substitute?

    Hahaha well I’d say that the more important is your capability to affect others positively in His name, and thus that would be the reason and degree to which God would care about your hair. ^.^

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