I know, I know

I haven’t updated in a while. A new post will be coming soon to talk about the ridiculous bureaucracy of the mva, how silly parents can be, and how ridiculous it is that a person out of high school can not get a job capable of paying rent, let alone other vital bills. It should be a lovely rant. Until then, dear reader.

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Cleaning

Today I am cleaning my room. I really enjoy cleaning because it helps me to think through things. When I’m physically putting things back in order as they should be I’m able to put my thoughts into order in my mind. I’m all caught up financially, which is good, and now I just need to catch up academically, which is going to prove a bit tricky, especially considering my Psych professor has yet to give me back the research I’m to be writing my paper off of… hrm. I’m mostly caught up on personal writing, which is very good. You’d think that would come after the academics, but I discovered a long time ago that if I have something I want to write, it will cloud my thoughts until I’m able to put it down on paper. Thank God for paper and for uni-ball vision elite pens. ^.^

In other news, I’ve figured out what to write in one of my journals and I just need to find a calligraphy pen to write in it. I have a calligraphy pen, but I’m out of ink for it and the stream is a bit too wide for the size of the book I’ll be writing in. You see, it’s always a journey finding out what my books want written in them, and after sitting on my desk for a few months, these two little slowpokes have told me what they’d like written in them, so I’m eager to get started on those. 🙂

Updated Lately

This past week was a good one to be sure. Wednesday I attended a tea party with some good friends and though it rained and was windy, it was a good time. We watched a few speakers that talked about everything that was wrong with the country and so on and so on and we’re sick of letting it go, we wanna see some changes around here. And not Obama “change”s. We’re sick to death of taxes and we want our elected representatives to say something about it instead of making a career from the position they’re voted into. It emphasized the idea that they work for us, which I was very happy about. So many people can overlook such a simple fact. The tea dumping, I thought, was a little anti climactic. The “tea” being dumped were a few wood boxes that were thrown into the harbor and they quickly scooped back up so that they could be thrown again. I was hoping to see some murky brown water. Even if it was environmentally safe coloring or something, I think it’d’ve been wonderful to leave a lasting reminder that we’re mad as hell at what’s goin on between Washington and our own home towns. It was mention that there will be more tea parties to come, so perhaps I’ll be satisfied in a lasting manner at one of those.

Saturday I took a day trip to New York City. It was my third time in New York and just as lovely as the first two. Probably my best trip yet, actually. I’m convinced that the company made the trip, as I did little that I hadn’t done in New York before. We ate at the Hard Rock Cafe, which was very interesting to say the least. Overall I was satisfied. It was probably the best cheeseburger I’ve had in a long time, but that could have easily been because I was so very hungry. Our waitress was excellent and the music mostly satisfactory. You know me and my music. 🙂 There was, however, a large panel stage cover that was basically an artistic replication of one of those “coexist” bumper stickers with all of the different religious symbols on it. There were many religious symbols and figures and in gold lettering around it was painted the question, “What do you love?” Irked at first glance, I sat with my back to it, so as not to let it ruin my meal. We also visited the Metropolitan Museum of Art during the trip, which was mind blowing. After being outside where it had grown quite toasty, we were drawn inside to the cooling marble walls. After looking through the armor displays, I glanced up and saw a beautiful golden piped organ and was naturally curious. So I insisted on seeing it and we climbed a few stairs (I tripped up a few) and there stood this beautiful wood organ. It was rather old and the keys were faded wood…it was lovely. There were other instruments around, like guitars made from gourds, one made from a molded armadillo shell. We stood on the balcony for some time, people watching and looking down on the exhibit below. I saw a man walk into a dimly lit room with shaded glass doors and was curious, so I followed him. At the sight of what was in the next room, I dropped my bag, my mouth fell open, and I couldn’t help but laugh a little. The exhibit was the progression of musical instruments through the ages, from the harpsichord through the piano forte and piano with the strings and woodwinds and at the end of the exhibit, the brass. I couldn’t help but stand motionless, just taking it all in for a moment. It. Was. Stunning. I’d never seen a piano forte in person before, so that was pretty darn neat. There was also a beautifully ornate grand piano that I just wanted to snatch up and take home with me, though God only knows where I’d put it. This was one of the highlights of the day, and the greatest one that I will list on this interface.

Yesterday, Sunday, I went to Hershey Park with four dear friends, which was a blast. We didn’t ride all too many rides, but that didn’t really matter too much. The company was good, as was the conversation, and that’s all that mattered. Now before I go on, there is something you must understand about my friends. We are dating each other, that is the two men with the three ladies in combinations that only include a man and a woman. Many people think this is strange, but through our personal beliefs it is what makes the most sense. Secular dating is over rated and this is the way to go. That being said, with two men and three women, all being affectionate of each other, you get some strange looks. This also happened in New York when I was with my friends Em and Joel. You see, we all love each other very much and we’re not afraid to show it, even with myself and my girl friends and these two gentlemen with each other as well. It’s the way things should be. Now that being said, we very much enjoyed people watching that day. We walked around the park for some time linked across, all five of us. With three former marching band students, a dancer, and a music and rhythm sensor walking side by side (by side by side by side), we were walking in step. And in the course of getting from point A to point B, we got many interesting looks, a few “haha that’s great”s, and one group that wanted to take our picture. Very amusing. We also got quite a few looks when the five of us took over two side by side benches and sprawled out comfortably over them. There is always an amusing mix of curiosity, jealousy, disapproval, and entertainment in the faces of the people passing by. The highlight of the day, however, was the picture opportunity for the tour we took at the end of the day. When you visit Hershey Park’s Chocolate world, there is a tour that tells you how the chocolate is made and so on. At the end of the tour is a photo opportunity, and boy oh boy did we take advantage of it. We had our two men starting a brawl over two seats in the car, one of our ladies being half knocked out of the car by said brawl, our second lady covering her ears and gaping wide mouthed at the brawl, and me covering my mouth with wider eyes than I have ever seen myself make. Needless to say, we bought the picture.

Today has been a bit of an annoying day. I was planning on getting much done today and ended up accomplishing little. From so much walking over the weekend my ankle has swollen up and I had to take some Tylenol and sinus medication earlier for my allergies as well. That knocked me out pretty good and between last night and this afternoon when I napped, I had some pretty unpleasant dreams. I realized over the course of the past few months that my dreams can be a key communicating factor with God and through that realization has also come some enemy interference  with my dreams. Yes, that is correct. God speaks to me through my dreams, giving me nudges here and there, and now there are demons messing with them. It’s shaking at times to be so personally invaded by demons, when they start meddling with your subconscious thoughts and turning your desires and goals into twisted visions that are real enough to touch and feel, but at the same time it’s encouraging. Now you’re probably wondering how can being attacked by demons be encouraging? Well, the wouldn’t be attacking me if I was going the way they want me to. Would they? They would be encouraging me, showing me exactly what I wanted to see, continuing me down a path that was not where I should be. Instead they are trying to scare me away from my life’s current direction, and there could not be greater confirmation that I am headed in the right direction, unless of course an angel appeared and told me so (in which case I would say, “oh, well that’s good…..*gasp!* An angel!”

I also wonder exactly what angels look like. I had a dream a two years ago, one in which I saw a young man who gave me instructions and I wonder now if he was a messenger from God. I would be shocked and blessed if it was confirmed somehow that he was. I don’t know how I could possibly be so important as to have a personal visit from a messenger of God, even if it was in a dream.

The Lord really blows my mind sometimes.

Kinda Sickly

So I passed by the cemetary today where Joe Flora was burried and it still strikes me pretty hard just to drive by like that. Really makes you think about how your life impacts others when someone passes on, especially someone who walked closely with Christ. Makes you wonder just how much you impact people and how much you strive after the Lord. I’ve been to two funerals this year. The first was for Joe Flora, a guy I went to high school with. He graduated two years before me and earlier this year he comitted suicide. I know I’ll see him again one day. The second was for Bob Cashman, a good friend’s father. It’s never easy seeing a family mourn over losing it’s leader. And he was. In fact, I never met Mr. Cashman and his funeral was far harder than Joe’s. Though Joe was young, he was only responsible for himself and his parents and siblings would miss him most. Bob Cashman was married and an exellent father and husband, and a spiritual leader in his entire family’s life, even on days when he was discouraged by his illness. I can not imagine.

It’s reflecting on the lives of people passed away that reinforces that my life must be constantly driven to God, no matter what. My life is by all means His and I damn well better act like it. Yes, I damn well better act like it.

Today I feel pretty sick. My stomach’s been flipping back and forth between being perfectly fine, nautious, and violently upset. It does this every once in a while when I’ve had some sort of different food, but it hasn’t been this bad since last year. I missed class today and I most likely will tomorrow. Not good at all. I can not afford to miss class right now. But I was barely out of my house today and I doubt I will be tomorrow. I hope I am well by Wenesday.

WEDNESDAY! Wednesday is the TEA Part. You should go. Yes you. You. Right there. Reading this. Go go scoot. Go to google and search for tea party 2009 and find a location near you! That’s what I’m doin Wednesday, goin to the Tea Party in Annapolis. And you should be there too! Or..well you know, wherever it is that is the nearest location to you. Provided you’re an American citizen. Oh this is all getting very complex. Well bottom line is that is what’s going on Wednesday and that is what I hope I am better to attend.

Homesick

I. Could. Stand here lookin at you for a thousand years.
And if I could, I’d fly to the heavens and meet you there,
But this gravity keeps holdin me down.

I will have periods of time where I feel homesick. Sometimes just a few hours, sometimes a few days, sometimes lingering for a few weeks. And the homesickness isn’t one that’s for being at my house or someone’s house or even for the home I’ll have one day with my husband, whoever he may be. It’s the home I know that I have waiting for me in my next life…I feel like it’s so close, close enough to almost touch…just barely close enough to long for. And yet it’s so far away. And so my friends, if I tell you that I am homesick, know that it is for no home any man can provide.

Whew!

Well after updating my about section I’m quite breathless at what to say here. Recent days have been pretty easy, just going through college and so on. I’m taking four classes this semester: Biology (with lab), Psychology, Sociology, and Bible Literature. I’m learning a good bit, but my grades are not always reflecting how much. For example, my Biology grade is awful, but I’m learning things that I never fathomed in high school, which is very encouraging to me.

I’m still working the Cafe at Big Vanilla every single Saturday from noon to five. It’s a dull shift and I don’t make much in tips, but where else am I going to find a job these days? I’ve picked up a friend’s Friday shift for next week, so that should give me some good tip money.

This coming summer I’m going to be taking a trip to Rome with the Annapolis Area Christian School Madrigal Singers. This is the singing group I was in during high school and alumni have been invited to join the current members on this rare trip. We will be the only high school group attending the International Church Music Festival. I can’t believe how blessed I am to have an opportunity to travel. I’m so excited!!! I have never been overseas before and the only out of country experience I have had was to Canada when I was very young, far to young to remember more that a sopping wet boat under some waterfall everyone seemed to make a pretty big deal about. I couldn’t even see over the railings. Anyways, This is a trip I’m really looking forward to and I am eagerly awaiting it.

Right now, however my dinner is ready and my mind is rather blank. So I will leave more writing for tomorrow and bid you farewell for the evening.

Hello world!

Hello all. My name is Denise and I needed a fresh start on a publicly acessable blog. This is mostly to keep my friends and I suppose family (or rather those friends who are family, that’d be more fitting) updated on my life, where I’m at, and where i’m headed. I’m still figuring out all of this WordPress stuff, so have patience with me if I don’t respond to a message or request or something right away. I’ll be updating in more depth tomorrow, no doubt.